To Dev or not to Dev

I've been a software developer now for almost 8 years. Before then use to play around with code, but my core focus used to be sales and software/hardware support. I have always learnt as I go, never really considering the real impact of what I do. I am not sure if it has to do with me growing older, or just me becoming more aware of how much I enjoyed what I am doing, but around a year ago I decided it is time I started giving back to the community. I got more actively involved where I can, particularly in training other developers, and future developers. I also wanted to be able to share my knowledge with others.

I also consider myself a Microsoft Evangelist. I started out in ASP, moved on to DLL's using VB and later full VB programming using VB 6. I was a bit slow on the uptake for .Net, however got involved in developing a system using VB.Net, and then started playing with C#. I now mainly code using C# and the .Net Framework too, and I am also busy studying for my MCTS qualifications. I have a lot of respect for what Microsoft has achieved in the last few years, and although I am not blind to other technologies, including PHP, Delphi, Ruby on Rails and the various other flavors of coding languages, I remain a proud Microsoft Developer.

Both online and offline I have been actively involved in SA Developer.Net as well as contributing to DotNet.org.za. Though my own blog and my development blog I've tried to provide information and tools to others, every opportunity I have. I have also built a close relationship with Microsoft offline and try and be involved in as many projects as possible, including hosting the SA Developer.Net events in KZN and being a Microsoft Community Distributor.

I was busy following up on some of the SA Developer.Net forum posts this morning, one of my tasks as Forum Moderator, and suddenly realised that something was missing. The normal feeling of satisfaction I used to feel when contributing, in any way, was not there anymore. I have felt disorientated lately with a lot of my online activities, and often feel like I am a single fish swimming uphill. My reasons for being involved has always been for the feeling of accomplishment and the feeling of satisfaction when someone has learned something, or was able to take something away through something I have taught or resolved.

After taking some time to consider this, I've decided to take a sabbatical from my online activities. I most likely will end up blogging more often then before, but my involvement in any of the community forums I am involved in is going to be put on ice. Maybe I need to do some soul searching, or maybe I just need a break from what has become an unsatisfactory daily routine. I know I want to remain involved in the development community, and I am hoping a leave of absence will allow me to clear my head and get my focus, and passion back.